[Writing - Prospective // Goldilocks and the three bears!]
“Wash her up!”
Father bear stormed up the stairs after seeing the state of his family's beautiful home, as he finally reached the bedrooms he was met with much more stress. He marched to the bed where the girl laid her head, and ripped off the bed sheets. Father bear grabbed the girl by the chin, which gave the girl quite a shock .
While looking at the state of the troublemaker herself, Father bear thought might as well give her a pleasant wash too as well of the house. But the girl gladly refused as she attempted to fight back! After some tugging, pulling and biting, Mother and Father bear managed to toss her into their large bath. But the girl still didn’t learn discipline and accept the faint. The bears scrubbed her until her skin became smooth, they cleaned and brushed her hair until it glowed and felt like silk.
The bears were delighted to how beautiful the little girl looked well, on the outside. The girl was still moody as a teenager, but the job wasn’t finished. The bears gave her a mop and the house cleaning began. The girl scrubbed and dusted, but she swore under her breath as she did but none of them heard because they didn’t care.
When the job was done, the bears thanked her but she just slammed the door and marched somewhere far away that’s not there.
What I found hard: I found it hard to make the story flow.
What I found easy: I found it easy to think of the story's perspective on the spot.
What I could do next time: Next time I could maybe make it longer.
Hi Annabelle,
ReplyDeleteI like how you have set out your work, I also liked that you have explained what you had trouble with.